Simply Marilla

Oh The Food...

2012-02-08T16:07:00.000-08:00

eataly

The best thing about New York is definitely the FOOD. I feel like all we did was eat, well actually that is all we did.

Goat cheese ravioli in a lemon butter sauce from Otto, what is left of it anyway. I often forget to take pictures because I am so excited about the food, not good.

Pizza from Otto

MILK CHOCOLATE CHIP GELATO, HAZELNUT CROCCANTE, CRÈME FRAICHE GELATO, CHOCOLATE SAUCE, CARAMEL CREMA

This dessert was seriously one of the best things I have ever eaten. The gelato was so rich and creamy with a really deep flavor. Wonder if I could duplicate this?

One of the most fascinating things about NYC is all the markets and food vendors. Not only is the food extremely convenient, it seems fresh. You can find anything you need pretty much anytime of day. I would have loved to be able to buy some of this seafood to take home.

Eataly, Dean and Deluca and Chelsea Market are my idea of sightseeing. They are all perfect, unique and crowded, which is nice to see because every specialty market that opens in this area doesn't do well.

Cupcakes everywhere!

Brunch at Rockefeller Center.

Sightseeing in NYC

2012-02-07T16:07:00.001-08:00

New York is such an incredible city. I live in the country, just outside of a city that is trying to repurpose itself but just can't seem to find its indentity. Manhattan is such a vibrant city with so much to do and see. I can't imagine waking up every morning, walking out the door of a beautiful Brownstone and having so many options for the day. I hope to someday spend a month renting a place in Manhattan so I can get a glimpse into real city life.

NYC...Here I come!

2012-02-02T08:52:00.000-08:00

I'm off to New York City tonight where I will be doing some sightseeing.....

some shopping....

abc carpet & home

lots of eating and drinking....

eataly NYC

and best of all, seeing this little hit show....

book of mormon

A Little of My Lately

2012-01-30T16:34:00.000-08:00

Lego's everywhere.

Supposed to be doing homework.

Way to busy to keep up with the folding, notice the Christmas tablecloth still on and the Hogwarts castle peeking out?

Coconut macaroons!

Making oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.

Love

2012-01-23T07:10:00.000-08:00

via pinterest

I have been thinking about love a lot lately and all it's complexities. Love is like this strange entity that can bring us incredible joy and giddiness one day and complete sadness and heartbreak the next. Why does this thing create such havoc in our lives?

And Fun Was Had By All....

2012-01-22T11:16:00.001-08:00

Family Time

2012-01-09T12:17:00.001-08:00

We are off to Walt Disney World.......my friends always ask me why I love to go there so much? It is so hard to explain. I don't know if its because I grew up going there with my Mom, Dad and Sisters, some of my best childhood memories are at Disney. It could be because my Ex and I used to enjoy romantic weekends away there when life was easy, Maybe its because when we are there I feel really connected to the boys, no Xbox, no computers, no distractions just us walking around riding rides, laughing and enjoying ourselves. Disney is this magical place where you feel like a kid, and definitely aren't afraid to act like one, even my very mature 13 year old.

So let the new memories begin with new loved ones.....

Dreaming...

2012-01-06T07:37:00.000-08:00

Dreaming of spending the weekend here curled up by the fire, reading a good book with a nice glass of wine in my hand... via Wit and Delight

via flickr

via The Tiny House Blog

In reality, I will be here.....

What? Under a $1,000

2012-01-04T11:06:00.000-08:00

I saw these sofa's over at Design Sponge from the Home Decorators Collection. I can not believe they are under a $1,000, some of them are under $600. I love the grey colors. Either the grey tufted one at the top or the black leather tufted on the bottom would look great in my house!

Winter

2012-01-03T17:38:00.000-08:00

It's like 2 degrees outside so I can't help but think about Winter and all her beauty. These pictures are from last year. We haven't had that much snow yet this year which makes driving to work awesome but sitting by the fireplace and looking out the window, not so pretty.

2012!

2011-12-30T06:09:00.000-08:00

Pretty Stuff

So pretty, what a great way to spend New Years Eve! I am so having a dinner party next New Year's Eve.

Rifle Paper Co.

I am so excited about the New Year. There is just something so refreshing and hopeful about the New Year. 2011 was so much better for me then 2008, 2009 and 2010. Since the middle of 2008 I have felt like I am on cruise control just trying to survive. However, now I am ready to do more. I feel like this is my year to thrive not just survive. I want to become that person I see myself being. I want to worry less about money and focus more on my health and my relationships.

So this is my year, 2012, plus I love even numbers!

Feeling Christmas-y!

2011-12-20T05:31:00.000-08:00

Perfection

2011-12-07T08:54:00.000-08:00

Florence and the Machine - Shake It Out (Acoustic) from Pick Up The Headphones on Vimeo.

via Tomboy Style

Gratitude

2011-11-26T06:37:00.000-08:00

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity... It turns problems into gifs, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow." - Melodie Beattie.

Gorgeous Food Blog 2

2011-11-22T20:00:00.000-08:00

Roost, this blog also has beautiful pictures, but the food ideas are so unique. There are food gift ideas, entertaining ideas and healthy recipes. Everything is about this blog is just done so well.

So Grateful for All the Gorgeous Food Blogs

2011-11-22T08:45:00.000-08:00

Spoon Fork Bacon, besides the incredible pictures, the recipes are very clever and look delicious.

My Sister

2011-11-19T05:41:00.001-08:00

What can I say, she has been my rock for the past few years and without her, the kids and I probably would not function.

I am forever grateful for you Marianne.

My Parents

2011-11-08T06:12:00.000-08:00

They hold my children.

They are willing to play pretty much anything with my children.

I am so grateful for my parents, I could never express how much they mean to me. I had a wonderful childhood filled with a lot of love and a lot of laughs. No matter what heartbreak came along we never forgot as a family how lucky we are to have each and to never take ourselves too seriously.

My Mother is a very intelligent woman with an incredible strength about her.

My Father is extremely smart too, but he is also one of the most generous and kind people I know.

Art

2011-11-07T05:07:00.000-08:00

I can't stop looking at this picture by Sandy Skoglund, "Revenge of the Gold Fish". Isn't that what art is supposed to do , make you linger?

via Kirtsy

Ryan

2011-11-06T05:47:00.000-08:00

My Ryan, my youngest by 10 minutes, is 10 years old also. Ryan is this child who not only challenges me the most but he also surprises me the most. He is very artistic and creative. He can dance, sing, write and make incredibly elaborate Lego creations. Ryan has this very unique personality and he not afraid to be himself, which I admire.

Ethan

2011-11-05T05:50:00.000-07:00

Ethan, technically my second born but only by 10 minutes, is 10. I am so incredibly grateful for Ethan, besides being very smart, he is a charmer. He is extremely good looking and athletic (only a mother's modest opinion). He will be the one I will have to protect from all girls. People are naturally attracted to Ethan because he is quiet and sensitive and good. He just has this innate kindness about him.

Clayton

2011-11-04T09:24:00.000-07:00

I am so grateful for my son Clayton, my oldest, 13, yikes. He is so intelligent. It's like he this old, wise soul who really just seems to have the ability to understand people and complex situations. Plus he loves to cook with me!

Gratitude

2011-11-03T15:50:00.000-07:00

It's November which to me means time to remember to be thankful for all the blessings in my life.

I am going to try to post a picture everyday of all the wonderful blessings in my life.

I Heart This Kitchen

2011-11-03T05:00:00.000-07:00

contemporary kitchen design by san francisco architect Ken Linsteadt Architects

This kitchen is so light and airy. I would love to entertain and cook with my boys in this space.

contemporary kitchen design by san francisco architect Ken Linsteadt Architects

Flight of the Frenchies

2011-11-02T11:14:00.000-07:00

I saw this over at Black Eiffel and I could stop watching it even though I am deathly afraid of heights and was getting a bit queasy. I can't wait to watch the whole film. These guys are amazing.

I Believe I can Fly ( flight of the frenchies). Trailer from sebastien montaz-rosset on Vimeo.

Love

2011-10-21T06:57:00.000-07:00

Lately, I have been getting lost in this blog, Tomboy Style. I've always loved the preppy tomboy look, probably because I was a tomboy. All of these lovely photos remind me of growing up in the late 80's it must have been the tomboy era. I grew up in West Palm Beach, sort of across the tracks from Palm Beach, and I would drive around Palm Beach admiring the beautiful homes and the beautiful people. I would browse the stores on Worth Avenue trying to look like I belonged there. This picture captures the essence of the perfect Palm Beach Polo scene, the boots, the Lacoste shirt, the Mercedes, the Louis Vuitton bag, so perfectly preppy.

Who didn't have Doc Martin's in the late eighties? I think I still have mine but I definitely need a new pair.

photos via Tomboy Style

It'a All About Halloween At My Parent's House

2011-10-11T05:00:00.000-07:00

My Mother is a hard act to follow. She has really mastered the holiday decorating and entertaining. She has this ability to take the easiest, simple dinner and make it special. She spoils my children and I and I will forever be grateful for all she has taught me.

Halloween All Around Roger's House

2011-10-09T18:35:00.000-07:00

Loving Fall

2011-10-08T18:30:00.001-07:00

Beautiful

2011-10-07T16:51:00.001-07:00

Steve Jobs

2011-10-06T06:58:00.000-07:00

"Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.” Steve Jobs

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs

Pure genius

Monkey Bread....So Easy!

2011-10-03T05:02:00.000-07:00

Recipe

4 cans of Pillsbury biscuits

3/4 cup sugar

1 teaspoon cinnamon

Glaze:

1 cup of sugar

3/4 cup butter

2 tablespoons on cinnamon

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

For the glaze, mix all the ingredients in a small pan and bring to a low boil.

Cut the biscuits into fourths. Mix sugar and cinnamon and toss the quartered biscuits in the sugar/cinnamon mix. Drop half of the pieces into a greased Bundt pan or 10 inch tube pan and then pour half the glaze over the pieces in the pan. Then place the remaining pieces of biscuit in the pan and pour the remaining glaze mixture over the top of the biscuit pieces. Bake at 350 degrees for 45-50 minutes. Cool for 5-10 minutes. Turn out on a plate and enjoy!

Saturday Night Yum!

2011-10-02T06:42:00.000-07:00

Made Me Laugh...

2011-10-01T09:03:00.000-07:00

via Pinterest

Dreaming of...

2011-09-23T11:37:00.001-07:00

Now that Fall is fast upon us, I am dreaming of a kitchen with a fireplace. It just makes the heart of the house so cozy. Perfection!

Much Needed Inspiration

2011-09-22T11:05:00.001-07:00

Image via hiphipgingin

This Economy is Kicking My Ass!

2011-09-20T06:25:00.000-07:00

When I was growing up things were good, really good, as a matter of fact I am the youngest of four girls and by the time I came along my Father had built a very successful business and my Mother had gone back to work. All of this resulted in me being able to go to the private schools I so loved, getting the newest gadgets (which was a CD player at the time), the coolest clothes, lots of traveling and a brand new Mustang for my 16th birthday. I will admit that I was spoiled, not a brat, but definitely spoiled. I LOVE the finer things in life excellent food, traveling, the best handbags and designer shoes but things have changed, not just for me, for a lot of people and it’s a hard adjustment.

I always thought my children would have a financially good childhood like I had, if not better, but they do not. Their lives do not consist of fine restaurants, traveling, private school or brand name clothes. My children have a single Mother whose biggest concern is trying to feed them and keep our home. It’s not a life I would have picked for them, but it is a good life. It has been an extremely hard three years but I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Not only do I have a job that I love and actually enjoy going to, I have managed to keep my home thus far and for that I am extremely grateful. My children are growing up with a greater since of appreciation for the things they do have and for the people in their lives. We are so thankful for the family and friends that support us and help us get through each day. So despite how different things are now, neither my children nor I will ever forget how blessed we are.

My Weekend

2011-09-12T03:25:00.000-07:00

It makes me so happy when I take my children to the farmer's market and I see them appreciating all the fresh fruits and vegetables. I love that they are willing to try all types of berries and greens, things even I am apprehensive about trying. My goal really is to make them aware of where their food comes from and how to prepare it. I'm grateful my children have better eating habits then me!

Yum....End of the Summer Bounty

2011-09-09T05:57:00.000-07:00

So Cool

2011-09-06T03:44:00.000-07:00

High Wheel by Maider Lopez from maider lopez on Vimeo.

via Honestly WTF

Cookie Love

2011-09-05T12:20:00.000-07:00

Barefoot Contessa's Chocolate Chunk Cookies

recipe from For Me, For You

We love, I repeat, LOVE chocolate chip cookies in this house. I usually make Barefoot Contessa's Chocolate Chunk Cookies and get rave reviews, (I actually sold quite a few of these when I owned a specialty food store). We all know Ina can do no wrong, but I decided to break what is probably a 9 year tradition and try a new chocolate chip cookie.

I followed the recipe exactly, I even let the dough rest about 40 hours. The outcome, these cookies where really good and totally different then Ina's. Both cookies have a sweet and salty taste which I love, but they both have completely different textures. These cookies are thicker, more doughier then The Barefoot Contessa Cookies. I actually think this recipe would be great for a large cookie cake or cookie bars.

So after polling a few of my favorite people, Barefoot Contessa's cookies were the favorite among family and this recipe was preferred among my friends, hmmm..... Maybe there is a cooking tasting party in my future???

Nice Surprise

2011-09-05T11:36:00.000-07:00

I came home from work Thursday to find a pleasant surprise awaiting me. See, in my family we are all Food Network fans and after just watching Jeff Mauro win this season of "The Next Food Network Star" my Mother and my children decided to surprise me with the food he made on his first show, Dry-aged Italian Beef Sandwich with Homemade Giardiniera and Sweet Peppers.

Homemade giardiniera, which I actually really liked on the beef sandwich. It added this surprisingly nice crunch to the steak sandwich but it was a bit spicy. I am kind of a wimp when it comes to spicy things. Also, I am happy to report 2 out of 3 children tried the giardiniera.

The best Mother ever!!

The beef came out so tender and flavorful. This would be a great meal for a party, everyone can assemble their own or you could even make sliders.

Recipes

Homemade Giardiniera:
1 cup diced carrots
1/4 cup diced celery
4 serrano chiles, sliced into rounds
1 cup small cauliflower florets
1 tablespoon minced garlic
1/2 cup julienned red bell peppers
1/4 cup white wine vinegar
3 tablespoons salt
2 1/2 cups canola oil
1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil

In a small pot, add the carrots, celery, chiles, cauliflower, garlic, bell peppers and vinegar and cover with water. Season with the salt and bring to a light simmer. Bring to a boil and simmer for 15 minutes; the vegetables should still be crisp and bright. Drain and cool in the refrigerator for at least 1 hour. Add the oils to the vegetables and store in an air-tight container for up to 2 weeks in the refrigerator.

Beef:
1 top round rump roast, tied with butcher twine in 2-inch increments
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
3 tablespoons grapeseed oil
6 cloves garlic, chopped
1 yellow onion, chopped
2 tablespoons dried Italian seasoning
1 tablespoon crushed red pepper
1 cup dry red wine
3 cups beef stock
2 sprigs fresh thyme
Salt and freshly ground black pepper

For the beef: Preheat the oven to 300 degrees F.
Sprinkle the roast liberally with salt and pepper. In a heavy-bottomed roasting pan over high heat, heat the grapeseed oil until shimmering. Add the roast and sear all sides until a golden crust forms, about 10 minutes. Remove and set aside on a sheet tray. Add the garlic, onions, dried Italian seasoning and red pepper flakes. Saute until caramelized. Add the wine and deglaze, scraping the bottom. Add the stock, thyme, salt and pepper, to taste, and bring to a simmer. Return the roast to the pan and any accumulated juices from the sheet tray. Roast in the oven, turning every 20 minutes, until the internal temperature of the meat registers 125 degrees F, 1 hour 30 minutes to 2 hours. While the roast is cooking, start on the garnishes.

When the roast is done cooking, remove from the oven and let rest under tented foil. Strain the juice from the roasting pan into a saucepot. Bring to a simmer, skim the fat from the top and adjust the seasoning, if necessary. Hold warm over low heat.
To build the sandwiches: Very thinly slice the roast by hand or on a deli slicer. Dredge a roll through the cooking juices and top with 4 to 6 ounces sliced meat. Garnish with the Homemade Giardiniera and the sweet peppers.

Odd Yet Beautiful

2011-09-02T17:49:00.000-07:00

via http://sylvinkainwonderland.blogspot.com/

Thinking About Lunch.....

2011-09-01T08:14:00.000-07:00

Via Alexandra's Kitchen

I want....

2011-08-29T16:11:00.001-07:00

This Haircut

This Outfit

Sick....

2011-08-27T10:35:00.000-07:00

Well, my staycation has not gone quite as I planned. We never made it to the mall, the movies or even downtown. We did manage to make it to the taco food truck the boys have been wanting to go too. After waiting an hour to order, Ethan throw up in a trash can near the long line of people waiting to order. Sorry food truck not good for business. Since I had already ordered I had to make sure Ethan was alright while listening for my name to be called to pick up our order. I do have to say my fish tacos were excellent though.

So this week I have done nothing but watch way to many movies on pay-per-view and hold sick children. I wouldn't change it for anything.

Perfect Gift

2011-08-25T07:36:00.000-07:00

What a perfect food gift for a new neighbor or to bring to a house warming party. What a perfectly simple tag on the caramel sauce. Who wouldn't love one of these?

I will never forget when we moved into our new home, with a 2 1/2 year old and 8 week old twins, our wonderful neighbors brought us a plant and a much needed bottle of champagne. Not only did I feel special, I felt like we picked the right place to raise our children.

Thinking About Fall.....

2011-08-24T05:36:00.000-07:00

It's been getting cooler here and the days are getting shorter which means its beginning to feel like Fall. This makes me so happy because Fall is my favorite season, wait maybe I say that every season. I think I just love change and the seasons. I am so glad my children get to grow up in Western New York and experience the seasons.

I was surfing around Pinterest, I am so addicted, and I can't help but to start thinking about Fall and Holiday ideas.

This caramel apple bar is the coolest idea. How fun would it be to have a party and let your guest make there own apples. I think this would be a hit with both kids and adults alike.

The perfect party favor, what a delicious way to say thanks you.

Sunday Supper

2011-08-21T12:18:00.000-07:00

I really enjoy spending my Sunday's cooking, especially with the boys. I try to make enough food so we have some extras we can use during the week. The weekdays can be so crazy, especially with football season now in full throttle. I have been wanting to make this sauce I found here Smitten Kitchen for some time now. This recipe is so easy and and so worth it. The sauce tasted so fresh and flavorful, I think it would make a great tomato soup too. The sauce was a little too chunky for me though so I put it through the food processor to get it smooth the way I like it. Also, I doubled the recipe so we could have it all week with pasta and as a pizza sauce.

Then I made Jamie Oliver's pizza dough recipe, it was so easy and it came out nice and thin, not to doughy. It was so good, I am going to use this recipe from now on when I make dough. Plus it made 5 pizza's. I think its always good to have dough on hand in case you need a last minute easy meal during the week or guest stop by.

Etsy Love

2011-08-19T13:02:00.000-07:00

I love these bracelets by MesaBlue. Wearing a wrist full of bracelets makes me a very happy girl. I'll take several, please.

These photographs by Little Brown Pen are so dreamy. Paris must be the most beautiful city. I can not wait until the day I can walk through the streets of Paris, so romantic and colorful.

Lazy Days of Summer

2011-08-16T08:43:00.000-07:00

When I watch my boys this summer staying up late and sleeping in all morning, I am instantly reminded of my lazy summer days. I loved that feeling of not having a schedule or any plans, just the freedom to wake up and do whatever you want, whenever you want.

This summer, I am really enjoying my time with the boys, cuddling on the couch watching Food Network until late at night, thinking about visiting Food Trucks and Farmers Markets.

However, as a parent, I now live by schedules. I need them to function normally. I come home from work and I have no idea what kids will be at my house or how many. I don't even know which of my 3 children will be home. This makes meal planning very difficult. See my Mother is in charge and with Grandma anything goes.

What I miss most about our school year schedule is that time in the evening, after I put the boys to bed, that is "my time". Time to watch trashy shows, read or surf the Internet. That time is gone in the summer and I miss it. I suppose summer will be over before you know it and I will be back to the dreadful homework situation.

Last Minute Summer Outfit

2011-08-15T05:00:00.000-07:00

I love a cute summer dress to wear on the weekends going to the farmer's market and out to lunch. This outfit would even work great for a casual summer dinner with friends at your favorite restaurant.

dress, purse, sweater, espadrilles and necklace

Happy Weekend

2011-08-12T12:19:00.000-07:00

I so wish I was spending my weekend lounging beside one of these lovely pools.....

How cool is the lettering on the bottom of the pool.

My sweet spot!

1, 2, 3

Words of Wisdom

2011-08-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

Last night I couldn't fall asleep, so I did what every girl does when they can't sleep, watch "Sex in the City". I forgot how wise Carrie can be. It was that episode where all the Navy men come into the city right after Aidan has broken up with Carrie.

She said something that I just couldn't forget.......
"Our past is like an anchor holding us back and we have to let go of that past/anchor in order for us to be who we were meant to be".

Thinking About....

2011-08-09T16:22:00.001-07:00

Summer is going by so fast. It's almost the middle of August and I feel like I have been so busy that I haven't had anytime to relax and just enjoy the weather. All I keep thinking is how much I would love to sit out on the deck and enjoy one of these lovely cocktails this weekend.

Frozen Lemon Vodka Slush

Strawberry Margarita Popsicles

Strawberry Champagne spritzers, 1 bottle of Sake, 1 bottle of champagne, 1 pint of strawberries, 6 Meyer lemons, fresh mint and some Vanilla stevia.

Lime Sorbet Margaritas. Salt the rims of the glass the place two scoops lime sorbet in the glass and pour 1 tablespoon of Tequila over the sorbet. Its like an adult slushy, Yum!!

Amazing Photos

2011-08-07T08:01:00.001-07:00

These photographs, taken by Sandra Critelli , of the Cownose Ray's migration, which takes place in The Gulf of Mexico, are beautiful.

Yeah Me!

2011-08-05T11:00:00.000-07:00

I joined a gym today, well that was the easy part now comes the hard part, going. I found a few pictures on pinterest to inspire me. I see some Zumba, yoga and Pilate's in my future.

Outfit Love

2011-08-04T16:24:00.000-07:00

Being a plus size girl isn't always easy, especially when it comes to being fashionable, but lately plus size fashion has been getting better offering a variety of options and brands. I can't tell you how happy this makes me. This outfit is from Lands' End. Lands' End has really expanded their plus size line, not only are the making classically stylish clothes, they are making clothes that are reasonable and well constructed. Hopefully my budget will allow me to purchase this outfit soon. I also love this handbag but I wish I could feel it because I am not sure about the leather and canvas match.

Mid-Year Resolutions

2011-07-31T11:42:00.000-07:00

I decided it was time for me to come up with some mid-year resolutions. I need to feel like I am making progress. Maybe if I write my goals down here on my blog I will remember to work toward them.

1. Run a 5K
2. Take Bikram yoga classes
3. Have a dinner party
4. Sleep more, eat less and cook well

Day Off.....

2011-07-26T06:44:00.000-07:00

I am taking the day off tomorrow to spend with the boys......its so exciting. Where am I going you ask??

Maybe relaxing here?
or maybe here?

Nope, I will be here in hot, stinky, ride hell. Oh well, should be fun to spend the day with the boys.

For My Children.....

2011-07-24T11:41:00.000-07:00

Ely Kim Presents: How to Lead a Phenomenal Life! from Ely Kim on Vimeo.

Loving

2011-07-23T06:46:00.000-07:00

pic http://sofreelyfly.blogspot.com/

I am so in love with this kitchen, the dark wood floors, the white cabinets and table, but the fireplace, oh that fireplace. The large wood burning fireplace makes the room look so cozy. I am dreaming of rolling out fresh pizza dough with the boys and cooking them on that fire. How nice would it be to have your own wood burning pizza oven right in your kitchen? I can see myself in this kitchen drinking coffee or a glass of wine with friends. What a cozy, warm place to host a dinner party.

Summer Fun

2011-07-18T17:01:00.001-07:00

Saturday.......

2011-07-18T05:58:00.000-07:00

I forgot how important it is to cut loose sometimes and just have a completely adult evening. We went out on Saturday to dinner and a concert, which is something I haven’t done in quite awhile. Usually I feel too guilty to go out. Sending my children to my parents for a sleepover is harder on me then the boys. They were excited to go, they had fun and I do believe it is important they spend time with my parents. So why all the guilt? I don’t know, but I do know it is not necessary.

Oh the food we ate, we had dinner at The Western Door at the casino. The wine, the clam’s casino, the filet topped with crabmeat and asparagus and the lobster macaroni and cheese, YUM! Everything was excellent and prepared very well but the best part of the evening was just enjoying the company and the adult conversation. I forget how I need that sometimes.

I also forgot how much I enjoy live music. We saw Melissa Etheridge. I have never seen her live before and was kind of surprised how good she sounded. Not only can she sing, but damn that girl can play a mean guitar. She even moved me to tears once. I always admire woman who process the talents I so wish I had.

Sorry the pictures are so bad, I took them with my phone.

Hope

2011-07-14T05:13:00.000-07:00

After rereading my previous post, I realize I may have sounded unhappy with were I am today in my life. I am not. I have been blessed in so many ways. I have someone in my life that treats me with the love and respect I deserve, someone who challenges me and spoils me at the same time and for that I am grateful.

What I was trying to say in my previous post is that when you end a relationship that you are in for half of your life, you are left with so many different stages of emotions. In the beginning the grief and sadness mixed with feelings of anger and betrayal rule your emotions and you go into survival mode. As time passes the anger subsides because you can’t live that way for your children’s sake or your own sanity. So as this time passed and began to heal me, as time usually does, one of the things that surprised me the most is the grief I felt for the future my children and I had lost. The plans and the vision that you had for your life and your family are changed in an instant.

As I went through this process, at first, I just stopped thinking I would even have a future. Then as I was getting more vested in my current relationship, I thought I could just fit that person into the old vision of my future. So what I was trying to explain in my previous post is that I now realize this is not possible or even fair to anyone. I can have new goals and dreams. I can have a family and a future that looks completely different. I will not grow old with person that I had thought I would. I may not be able to grow old in the home and the neighborhood that I adore. I will probably have to make a lot of decisions on my own and trust I am doing the best I can. However, I will still travel and hold my grandchildren and whether I do it alone or with someone new, I finally feel like I can be hopeful again.

picture

Broken

2011-07-11T11:38:00.000-07:00

My family is broken, having been torn apart two years ago by things that were out of my control even though I do take responsibility for my part in the breakdown of our relationship.

I often ask myself was this the best thing for us? For the children? ....Definitely not. For our families?.... definitely not. For my ex?..... I guess so. For me?.... I haven’t decided. I can honestly say I wasn’t happy with our relationship but I was content which I now know isn’t a good thing.

The hardest thing is finding myself in all of this. After 20 years together, you plan on growing old with that someone. All your dreams and hopes for the future are wrapped in that person. You plan on retiring together, living in your home together and traveling together but most importantly you plan on being grandparents together. When you break up all the plans for the future die along with the relationship. This is such a hard place to be mentally. You have to give up your dreams for your future.

I don’t honestly know if I will ever build a new life with someone else but I do know for sure that person will never love or enjoy my children as much as I do and that is a hard thing to fathom.

Any new relationship I have will always be different then what I have known since I was 20 years old. We aren’t building a life together we are joining two lives and families that are already established. I am slowly realizing that I can never get back the life I had. I cannot just insert someone new, no matter how happy they make me. The life I built with my Ex was one of a kind, which is both a blessing and a curse.

How does my new life look? How do I change my dreams to fit my new reality? How do I become the strong independent, single Mother I want to be? Am I capable of maintaining my home alone? Am I capable of supporting my children alone? Am I capable of being a “Part Time Lover”? Most importantly am I capable of building and dreaming of a future that is so different?

These Cake Pop's Rock

2011-07-09T17:00:00.000-07:00

These cake pops over are Bakerella are so damn cute I can't stand it. I don't think I have actually ever had a cake pop but I think I need to try one to see if they are actually any good.

I so wish I had these for my student's when I taught Earth science. They would have loved me!

Perfect for a summer party.

I need to make these for my Sister's next birthday. She is a total Diet Coke addict but look at the details this could not have been easy to make.

For my three gamers!

Fun and Tasty

2011-07-08T18:58:00.000-07:00

I had such a great 4th of July weekend. It is was nice just spending time relaxing, swimming, enjoying the weather and most importantly just being with friends and family. I was in charge of desserts this year and I wanted to make something festive. I usually make the typical flag cake with strawberries and blueberries so I wanted to try something different.

This flag cake came out pretty tasty and at least it looked like a flag when we cut into it but I mixed up the red and white layers. Any good patriotic American knows the red stripes should be on the bottom. I accidentally made three white layers and two red so I didn't have a choice but to switch them but at least it looks like a flag.
These S'mores bars were the hit of the party. I made these with chocolate chips instead of Hershey bars because I didn't have any when I decided to make these. If you like them really sweet then Hershey bars would be better but I really liked them with semi-sweet chocolate chips. Either way eating these makes you feel like a kid again.

Today I am Thinking....

2011-07-07T06:55:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure I got this picture from here.

Beach Day

2011-07-04T05:00:00.000-07:00

Ok.... well maybe more like lake day.

Teanagers???

Awe... the young at heart

Abbey Road?

Loving....Bon Iver

2011-07-03T17:08:00.000-07:00

Red, White and Blue...

2011-07-01T07:00:00.000-07:00

Fun party straws that go perfect with some lovely bottled soda.

OMG, this is the perfect 4th of July cake, I so hope I have the time and patience to make this cake this weekend.

How cute is this clutch and its only $35.00, perfect for summer.

Worry....

2011-06-30T07:47:00.000-07:00

I worry so much about my children. It consumes me and sometimes I just can't take it anymore. The situation is compounded because they are children of divorce who get carted away from me every other weekend.

I worry if they play to many video games (especially violent ones), if they watch to much TV, if they are on the computer to much, if they are eating right, reading enough, if they exercise enough, if they are too nasty to one another or others, I worry about everything.

Recently, I have been concerned about their spiritual health. At their ages, 13, 10 and 10, how aware should they be? We have never raised them in any faith because, honestly, we weren't sure of ours. However, lately I have found some spiritual relief in my life through meditation, gratitude and attempting to live being present. I want to teach my children to be more aware of the world, the people around them, to be grateful for the lives they were given and to practice loving kindness. How do I do that? I struggle with this. Can I teach them to put away all the distractions of today and just sit quietly?

This weekend I am going to try two things:

Giving them gratitude journals and taking a silent walk

Wish me luck or send good thoughts my way or something.....my children can't be quiet for more then 10 seconds.

This came from Buddhist Metta

"In true meditation, first you fill yourself with love mentally, 'May I be well and happy'. After a while you extend it to all others, saying mentally, 'May all beings of the Universe be well and happy'. Mean it and feel it. Also try to see that the world is filled with your love, with a great desire that they may be happy, a desire such as a mother has for her only child."

S'mores Lovin

2011-06-28T08:50:00.000-07:00

Who wants a big, sticky kiss?
Nothing says Summer like backyard bonfires with s'mores and popcorn. I think this is one of my favorite things to do with the kids on those long summer nights.

P.S. The boy in the background is not as close to the fire as he appears.

This s'mores cake is a delicious way to incorporate s'mores into your next outdoor dinner party.

These s'mores cookie bars looks like the perfect way to celebrate summer. I definitely see these in my future.

Finding My Mojo, again...

2011-06-23T11:09:00.000-07:00

According to the Urban Dictionary......

Mojo
N.

1. Self-confidence, Self-assuredness. As in basis for belief in ones self in a situation. Esp. I context of contest or display of skill such as sexual advances or going into battle.

2. Good luck fetish / charm to bolster confidence.

3. ability to bounce back from a debilitating trauma and negative attitude

I have been in such a funk lately and I am not sure why. Maybe its the terrible economy that is kicking my ass no matter how much overtime I work or maybe its the fact that have very little time or money to do the things I really enjoy. Maybe its the kids , the house, the laundry, the yard, the weight I have gained, all of which need my attention?

The thing is I am done being miserable and self pitying. I am going to pick myself up by my Payless bootstraps, not Fyre bootstraps :( , and carry on.

I need to slowly focus on a few things I truly enjoy, like blogging, photography, cooking and exercising until I begin to feel like myself again.

Learning....Hopefully Comprehending

2011-05-17T13:08:00.001-07:00

Seasons

2011-05-15T06:20:00.000-07:00

Having grown up in South Florida, I never thought about the seasons much, it was either hot or really hot. Since moving to Western New York I have come to really appreciate the seasonal changes. I love to feel the solace of Winter with its cold greyness. The Summer brings this appreciation for friends ,the sun, the heat, patios, pools and a good cold beer. Fall is like the last chance to appreciate all of the Earth's beauty before it sheds.

But Spring......Awe, sweet Spring, it give means this sense of renewal, this feeling that I can do anything, this feeling that I really can start anew. A chance to be better, a chance to do better!

Renewed

2011-05-11T07:39:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning feeling incredible. I don't know why, nothing special happened. You ever have one of the days where you wake up and feel like everything is going to be OK, despite the money troubles, the messy house or the busy schedules. I just feel alive today. I feel like I am incredibly blessed.

I have been practicing gratitude and being more mindful and I truly believe that helps give me the peace of mind to wake up and feel empowered.

No more swimming upstream for me. I am going to trust that the current of my life is taking me where I need to go.

By the way, I sure hope it takes me to this hut in Tahiti someday.

Love After Love

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

Derek Walcott

Daring Baker's Challenge- Yeasted Meringue Coffee Cake

2011-03-27T08:29:00.000-07:00

This is my first Daring Baker's challenge. At first I was a little nervous, maybe even scared, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. The dough was pretty easy to work with. It did take a little longer to rise then the recipe said but I think that is because it was so cold here.

The meringue was pretty easy to make but I think maybe I put to much in because the filling oozed out of the coffee cake.

Overall, the coffee cake was a hit. I am already getting request to make this again. I didn't think the dough was too dry at all. I think next time I make this dough I am going to make cinnamon rolls and I would also like to try a savory roll. Yum!

More Snow Ugh!!

2011-03-22T11:49:00.000-07:00

I am so ready for Spring, we are supposed to get 4-6 inches of snow tonight, UGH!!

Japan

2011-03-18T05:03:00.000-07:00

I can't stop thinking about everything the people in Japan have been going through and continue to go through. I think when something that tragic happens to so many people it makes you think about how delicate life can be. It also reminds us to be grateful for every precious day.
Since having children, I feel a greater since of awareness of our global community. I think when something happens to another nation we are all affected and lately there have been some incredible victories, tragedies and brutally violent situations.

I can't help but look at this father's face and feel like we aren't that different after all.

I'm sure by now you have all heard of the 50 brave men at the nuclear plant who are risking their lives, basically giving up their lives, for the people of their country. My heart goes out to them and their families.

As I was driving around Western New York, I couldn't help but think about how we are destroying our planet and I have a feeling SHE isn't too happy about it. Looking at these windmills gives me hope that we make wiser choices for our children's sake.

Donations can be made here Red Cross.

Missing....

2011-02-25T09:48:00.000-08:00

Lately, I have really been missing the evenings I used to spend cooking, eating and drinking wine with my dear friends. These last few years have been rather difficult, career changes, divorces and financial hardships, so entertaining has not been a priority or even realistic. I miss it terribly though, planning a dinner party energizes me. I spend weeks planning the perfect menu, simple but excellent food, usually something from The Barefoot Contessa. I crave the creativity that goes into making the invitations and just the right table scape but most of all I miss the connection I felt with my neighbors and friends as we talked about our children, our loves and our homes.

picture via Sweet Fine Day

Loving...

2011-02-19T09:54:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day

2011-02-14T14:00:00.000-08:00

My heart is full with these days with the love of my family, I am forever grateful for them and the joy they bring into my life.

HaPpy VaLeNtInE's DaY BaBe!

2011-02-14T13:00:00.000-08:00

Resolutions Being Kept

2011-02-13T07:02:00.000-08:00

I am trying really hard to keep my New Year's Resolution of organizing every closet and drawer in my home this year. This weekend I tackled my closet which was not an easy task.

It feels good to be organized and I even found some clothes I forgot about which will be nice to wear again. However....the best thing of all was finally getting my ex's clothes out of my closet. It's been almost two years now so it's time. Every step I take to making my home my own, especially my bedroom, makes me stronger. I feel free and independent, I like that!

What am I suppose to do with a gold framed portrait of son on his first birthday? I didn't have the heart to put it in the basement.

OMG...

2011-02-09T09:01:00.000-08:00

This girl is so hot, I so want to be her....
I definitely have style envy when I see pictures of her, so stylish yet classic.

From You Are My Favorite

Thinking About Valentine's Day!!

2011-02-08T17:00:00.000-08:00

It's almost Valentine's Day and for some reason it is so much easier for me to think about what I want..... I guess its time I think about what I am going to give!

I am imagining this necklace with our initials....

I am dreaming about these grey and smoke salted caramels from Fran's...

Another Snow Day...

2011-02-04T14:51:00.000-08:00

Organizing....

2011-02-02T10:00:00.000-08:00

One of my New Year's resolutions was to get organized this year. I am the queen of disorganization. However, I plan to change that this year, yes it will take me a whole year. I have been looking at this blog, Brooklynlimestone.com for some inspiration. These junk drawers look great and imagine everything being in its proper place. Imagine being able to actually find stuff when you need it. I so look forward to that day.

By the way....it worked out great when Ryan got hurt and needed a Band aid and Neosporin.

Thinking About Valentine's Day

2011-01-29T06:46:00.000-08:00

Picture from Just a Girl blog , so subtle and super cute!

Perfect, Fingerprints on the Fridge!

Scenes From the Yard

2011-01-27T09:00:00.000-08:00

Heaven....

2011-01-26T09:00:00.000-08:00

These Pretzel Rolls from Wegman's are the like a slice of carbohydrate heaven.

Next time I have a dinner party I am so ordering these!

A Day at the Office....

2011-01-25T12:47:00.000-08:00

Looking out the window from the office today, I realized I feel exactly how it looks. I have been fighting a head cold for a few day and I have no patience for being sick. I am not good at slowing down but I need to practice being still once in awhile.

This picture was taken from my phone in the middle of the day (really there is no sign of the sun today). These buildings remind me of Buffalo, an old and beautiful city trying to find its way in the modern world.

Normally, you can see the Lake Erie from here but not today......

I Want To Lay My Head Here Every Night.....

2011-01-21T11:44:00.000-08:00

Cindy Crawford's Bedroom via Elle Decor

This room looks so cozy, I love the fireplace.

Winter Blues!!

2011-01-20T07:04:00.000-08:00

It was 18 degrees this morning and I know its still January in Buffalo, NY, but I can't take it. I am sick of cold weather. I am sick of my shoes getting salty and muddy on my long trek to work. Being a girl from Florida, I haven't mastered the whole vibe where you carry separate work shoes in your purse. Some people leave shoes at their desk but how do they know if those shoes will match their outfit for the day? I guess you would have to plan every outfit around the shoes.

I bought these shoes yesterday on www.Landsend.com. Aren't they perfect? Plus they were on sale, only 34.99 regularly 89.50. What a deal and how cute will these be for the spring.

I may have to carry these in my purse because I can't wait until it warms up to wear them.......

Dreaming about....

2011-01-18T09:51:00.000-08:00

This cool Gold Watch, I am usually a silver person but this watch looks expensive and its only 42.00 dollars. Sometimes you just need to wear gold and don't want to pay a fortune.

This soup, Smoky Minestrone with Tortellini and Basil Pesto.. the perfect winter soup. I am so making this next weekend.

This perfect bag from the Infusion store on Etsy.

Thinking.....

2011-01-17T09:20:00.000-08:00

One of my New Year's resolutions was to stop procrastinating out of fear. I feel like I am waiting to LIVE my life until everything falls into some perfect space. If only I lost weight I would buy that outfit, if only I had enough money I would paint my family room, after winter I will start exercising, someday I will start a dinner club, maybe its time to start some of these things now instead of waiting until my life is perfect. I need to move forward even if I am afraid of failing.

So onward I go........

Maybe this site will help me www.motivateme.com. Maybe I will do the 100 day challenge hmm........

Sunday Breakfast

2011-01-16T08:16:00.000-08:00

It's My Party......

2011-01-11T06:26:00.000-08:00

Its my birthday, yeah me!

and I am here......

but I really wish I was here.......

Oh well, its OK because I am still planning on having a wonderful day. My boys are the absolute best and that isn't just a biased Mother speaking. They surprised me this morning with breakfast, including candles and singing. The best part however was a wonderful handmade card. I am really looking forward to this year. Last year was a little rough but for some reason I have this overwhelming feeling that great things are in store for us this year. I am so blessed, my children, my loved ones and a job I don't mind getting up for.

It's a good life.......